Alkyl moieties—open chain or cyclic—are common in drug molecules and can be internal or terminal. The open-chain alkyls can be linear or branched; the cyclic alkyls may be substituted. Usually, the branches in open-chain alkyls and substituents in cycloalkyls influence both the pharmacokinetics and pharmacodynamics of a drug molecule. The hydrophobicity of alkyl moieties in drug molecules is modified by metabolic hydroxy functionalization via free-radical intermediates to give primary, secondary, or tertiary alcohols depending on the class of the substrate carbon. The hydroxymethyl groups resulting from the functionalization of methyl groups are mostly oxidized further to carboxyl groups to give carboxy metabolites. As observed from the surveyed cases in this review, hydroxy functionalization leads to loss, attenuation, or retention of pharmacologic activity with respect to the parent drug. On the other hand, carboxy functionalization leads to a loss of activity with the exception of only a few cases in which activity is retained. The exceptions are those groups in which the carboxy functionalization occurs at a position distant from a well-defined primary pharmacophore. Some parent-drug equiactive hydroxy metabolites have been developed into metabolite ester prodrugs, while some of the parent-drug carboxy metabolites have been developed into metabolite drugs. In this review, we present and discuss the above state of affairs for a variety of drug classes, using selected drug members to show the effect on pharmacologic activity as well as dependence of the metabolic change on drug molecular structure. Some subtexts found to manifest from the hydroxy and carboxy functionalization of alkyl moieties in drug molecules are presented and discussed. The review provides basis for informed predictions of (i) structural features required for metabolic hydroxy and carboxy functionalization of alkyl moieties in existing or planned small drug molecules; and (ii) whether the resulting metabolites will possess pharmacologic activity or be devoid of it.